I apologize not being able to update for the past month. Basically i was very stressed out trying to pass my NCLEX exam.

For now, I would like to write my NCLEX journey and hopefully give hope to people who failed at least once just like me.

Im a batch 2009 BSN graduate from Philippines. anyone can count that for sure … thats 8 years out of school…My previous work were all straight Neonatal intensive care unit nurse, no adult experience. I failed nclex once as well last 2015, when i was in UK, i am really unprepared that time.

having said that, the failure was a big hit to my ego. it felt so hard to try one more time. basically, i am scared i will fail again. and i have a hard time finding the courage to take a leap of faith to study because the fear of failing is always higher. i am human after all and my ego has been high eversince i was young hehe.

I left my application unattended because i have to move from UK to USA so that i can be with my now means paperwork, making sure i did everything needs to be done in UK so i wont need to come back… But eversince i was in US, this has always been in my head… i need to be an RN – BECAUSE I WANT TO BE ONE. i really cant picture myself being in another job , maybe temporary yes, but not for long.

A lot of people have helped me, even those whom i become friends with here in my blog helped me, giving me reviewers, saunders online questions and LA charity pdf questions… i have read through a lot of individual successes and failures , advices from different people how they passed.

While studying for my NCLEX exam i have so much paperwork needed to be done because i am also applying for nclex california to know what are the subjects i will need to restudy…cgfns ces and lvn application. those were hard to complete as well because i am RN in both Philippines and UK.

I started gaining back the courage to study around October. i have a lot of struggle throughout,naming a few were the name change, visa interview, changing my name and address in NYBON, lets not forget contacting UK was hard too because of time difference…those were just a few.. but i really have a very loving and understanding hubby.

nearing my exam i am very stressed … the pressure was getting to me.. it was my hubby, my family, friends who were always there to listen when i am feeling all the sadness weighed in. i would always test for 100 items , read rationale, then test again another 50-100 items. that's how my days go by . Prayers really move mountains. i would cry while answering when my hubby was at work hehe. just because my scores were not that high. it reach to a point my scores were improving but deep down i dont feel i am improving at all.

Finally the date i scheduled for the exam came. night before i find it so hard to sleep. taking the 2 sleeping gummies helped me to sleep. my hubby drove me to the test site. the exam was really nerve wrecking! each time the computer asked if i want to have a break… i would say YESSSS! When i am outside, i would talk to myself – i can do this… as long as the computer gives me questions, i have a chance to pass! i have 3 breaks if i remember correctly. when i reached 180th question, i knew i was going it for the whole 265 questions maximum. my head was hurting already but i kept praying to God to help me… help me get through, i want to be a RN.

When i reached 264th question… i knew the next one was the last. i prayed hoping its not select all that apply question.but alas! it was a select all that apply! i was tearful, but still gave my best and then the computer stopped.

i was tearful as i went out… but hey i gave my best. i cried when i was in the car on the way home while talking to one of my friends in UK through video chat of how horrible the exam was.

Now i tried the PVT every Filipino is talking about… try to re-register again, put in credit card details, change expiry and the code behind…my result was a bad pop up and i literally cried. i talked to my family through we chat video telling them how hard the exam was and so as my few friends who knew my exam date… well its all left to the 48hrs quick result now. i have to say my hubby has always been the positive one, trying to be strong when i am weak.He knows this exam meant a lot to me.

On wednesday March 15, 2017 , my hubby was very sweet as he told me he will work from home so he can cheer me up if i do fail and be happy with me if i pass. i wasnt aware he got to the results before me, he paid for the quick results and ….i cant believe it, it was a PASS! Since i was thinking i failed all this time … it took a while before it hit me that i passed!

I am now US RN!

All the hardwork and effort paid off.

thank you Lord … You have always been with me… by Your grace I am a RN 2009 (Philippines), 2015 ( UK), 2017 (USA) Thank you to my family, friends, and my hubby for all the support…

finally ! i have climbed a mountain and i know there are more mountains to climb for me, because the road to California RN will take time.. and I'm sure with all the support from people who care and God guiding me along the way, I am sure i will reach it someday.

My message to test takers who are like me… international graduate, 8 years out of school or more … failed at least once… Dont give up! continue working hard and pray!

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